Tuesday, August 28, 2007

Unexpected Phone Call

During foster parent training, I'm often asked if we stay in contact with kids who've been part of our family. The short answer is "not for long," but the longer answer is more complicated. When we had teens who were in the juvenile justice system, we were seen as part of their "punishment," so few of them kept contact for more than a couple of months. For birth parents, it's probably one of the worst times in their lives, and if they get their lives together enough to parent their children, they're usually anxious to move on with their family. For typical foster children we usually stay in contact for a while so the kids don't feel abandoned (and suffer even more loss than they've already gone through), but then let the parents and kids know we're there for them, and would be happy to hear from them, but try to leave the decision up to them. At this time - there is no one from years ago who stays in contact with us regularly, but we're always surprised and happy when we do hear about someone, or especially, when we hear from them directly.

So . . . it was with surprise and delight that I answered the phone this morning, and it was a certain tall young blond fellow, who has reached the grand old age of 21. BB was a special part of our family through most of his high school years - arriving at 15 years old, and leaving just after he turned 18. We last saw him a year later, at the local HS graduation. Many of you knew him, and I'm happy to pass on his report that he's in college for his second semester, and studying to be a HS teacher and a coach. (No surprise there - he's one of the best motivators I know!) It hasn't been an easy road for him, and there have been some really rough patches along the way, but he is taking advantage of the things the state has to offer him for his education, and has plans for the future. He called needing a reference for a position helping with the football team, and I'll be happy to give that reference when the coach calls. If he's looking for a great motivator with a big heart - he's found his man!

Congratulations BB, and thanks for calling! You made my day!


strem said...

Oh, that's wonderful. I miss him and am glad to know he's doing well. Hopefully, he's not too far from your area and you might meet up one day?

Anonymous said...

I didn't know that you actually felt that way about me mom, that humbles me. Thanks for those kind words, and you were verry influencial in my life, as well as you have been in all your childrens lives. You are a great person, and I hope you continue to show the world that with a little kindness and love all is possible